The Rantings of a Tortured Mind

Valerie Rayne Rants


Leave a comment

Moody McMooderson


Today, I have felt like I’m on a roller coaster ride with my emotions. I’m all over the place. I wake up this morning and I’m all happy-go-lucky, then I watch some YouTube and for some reason, begin to get extremely agitated. The kids came home from school and at first I was all in love, then I was all annoyed and then, as dinner finished baking, I was sentimental and playful.

We watched Raising Hope on Netflix (which is such a cute show and I can’t believe I missed it when we still had cable…) and I flopped from not being able to hear it well enough one moment, to laughing or tearing up the next (depending on the situation in the show). The older kids went to bed, so immediately I felt relief and if a sigh didn’t actually escape my lips, it definitely had glided out of my body.

So I decided, what a perfect time to whip out the piano and play me some tuneage. But then, Carter came up behind me and started reaching around my arms to get at the keys. Instead of letting this consume me with bitterness, I succumbed to it and let him play with me. We experimented with the sounds, we played some stuff together and I even let him play alone. After a good 45 minutes had went by, I decided I was done. It was my turn to play.

We got him into bed, happily cradling his bottle, and I sat down in front of the keyboard again. As I struck the first note, The Boyfriend grabbed his Xbox mic, slid it onto his head and began, “Hey, how are you?”. See, he’s started playing Modern Warfare online with some of his buddies from work. It keeps him incredibly entertained and if it didn’t make him feel so guilty always playing video games, I’d never see him again.

I’m used to this kind of behavior. Every boyfriend I’ve ever had would rather spend all his spare time playing video games or watching movies that I sincerely hate. The Boyfriend is the worst for this! His only hobby is his video games (oh, and sort of Nascar… That one’s way less annoying though!), so whenever he can he likes to get on there and now that he’s got friends who play, he insists on putting this mic on.

When I’m not playing piano, I think it’s cute. It doesn’t bother me since I’m not making any other noises than typing when he’s playing his games. I’m okay with his nerdy social life. So my emotions went crazy during the first few minutes of this. First I was just outright annoyed, then I was “okay” with it because I had decided that I was just going to suck at piano anyways, so what was the point. I went out to the kitchen and got myself a drink and refilled Carter’s bottle and decided that I was just going to play piano. Whatever if I sucked, whatever about The Boyfriend’s mic. It doesn’t affect his time on it when I’m playing and I’ve done it before so what’s the difference.

I sit in front of my keyboards all ready to conquer that stuff, and look up at the screen and just feel completely bored! Needless to say, I haven’t played piano, I’m moodier than I like to be, I’m missing a guitar like crazy and I want to work on my website but I feel to moody! ARGH!!!


Leave a comment

All Work and All Play


I feel kind of bad… I’ve completely neglected my computer for two whole days. I haven’t checked my Twitter or my Facebook, I’ve done absolutely no work on Lifestyle Bloggers Anonymous and I haven’t even played any computer games!!

The other day, The Boyfriend asked if we could get him StarCraft. Well, I went out to get the kids stuff for school, and got him StarCraft at the same time. So I came home with stuff for him and even stuff for kids, plus a ton of groceries of foods I know they all enjoy. Nothing really for myself.

The next day, The Boyfriend comes home from work with two movies. Both of these movies I don’t really care to see, I’ll probably enjoy watching them, but wouldn’t go out of my way to see them. So I was a little disappointed, but then…

He pulled The Sims 3 out of a bag. I’ve wanted this game for quite awhile and could just never really justify getting it. I tend to rarely play video games, preferring to be on my computer, so I just never got it. But now I do and I have to admit I’m a little bit hooked.

I spent almost 16 hours on the poor XBOX, playing the heck out of the game. Mostly learning to build houses. I think the house that I have right now absolutely rocks! I’m letting The Boyfriend play now, and it’s the first chance he’s had since he got me the game.

Somehow, even though I’ve been playing all day, we ended up getting a TON of cleaning done today. I had mentioned it last night, and normally that means that we probably won’t do it the next day. But I was insistent. We cleaned under the furniture in the living room, finally cleaned under the desk and The Boyfriend has even got a good bit of laundry done.

The kitchen was a group effort, so I did the dishes while he swept the floor and then we had cinnamon pancakes for dinner, which is always fun. The kids love getting “snow” (icing sugar) on their pancakes and I love that I’ve finally figured out the perfect amount of syrup, so that they can still taste it, but not so much that they get completely sticky!

Kaeidyn and Kenzie are both officially in school and so far that’s being interesting. We’ve created a special spot just for their school papers, and I’m hoping that this year, we can actually keep that up. Last year we had created a space, and then everything else just kind of got piled on top of it. This year, I hope it’s different!

In other news, my boss at work is quitting and I’m a little sad and peeved about it. Her and I have finally gotten a pretty decent flow in the office and it’ll suck to have her leave when I feel like we work so well together. She’s been a great trainer, even though it’s harder for her to focus, but it’s been a great learning experience.

I’m peeved because I figured if she was quitting, likelihood would be that they would either bring in someone else from the office to do her job, or they would ask me if I would do it, being that she’s spent the last four and a half months teaching me her job. But instead, they hired somebody else and my boss is spending the next couple of weeks training her to take over her job.

We also had our receptionist quit awhile back and have recently hired a new receptionist. Since no one’s ever been trained on being the receptionist, we’re all trying to help out everywhere, and I personally feel like a lot of it falls on my shoulders. I kind of hate it that I have all these responsibilities outside of what my actual job responsibilities are, but I don’t get to have any title other than “The Assistant”…

Well, that’s what’s new today…