The Rantings of a Tortured Mind

Valerie Rayne Rants

This post is intended for adults 18+


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Did I Tell You About Last Night?


Thanks to The Boyfriend’s birthday, it has been two really great nights of sex-having and I don’t think it will be our last – not for at least another two days. I always love having birthday sex, especially when it’s not my birthday, because somehow it just always feels better. Even when it was the same sex you had just the night before, add the anniversary of someone’s birth in there and things just seem hotter.

The only thing that has even slightly sucked at all about the two nights (okay, technically, they were both in the same day. But one was at like 3 AM on Sunday and the other was just before midnight of that same day – but I slept in between, so that’s a different day for me…) was the porn. Let me clarify. I love watching porn and for the most part, tend to really enjoy doing it during the foreplay stage of sex. I don’t need a lot to get me ready to go for sex, so the foreplay is more for The Boyfriend than it is for me.

However, I’m really starting to not like his taste in porn – and not because he has bad taste, but because everything he wants to watch makes me insanely jealous. And, if this were the me of 5 or 6-years ago, it would be jealousy because he’s getting so turned on by these women on the screen, but that’s not it at all. No, instead, I suffer with being jealous because I so desperately want the things that he really enjoys watching.

When it comes to porn, The Boyfriend is all for anything lesbian. If it’s got 2 girls in it, he’s game. He even prefers that, when we pick heterosexual porn, there be 1 guy and 2 girls (at least), because he really has a thing for watching lesbians. And trust me, I really do too. But immediately, the second he even suggests it, I just fill with a whiny type of jealousy that normally results in me playfully sobbing, “I want to do that!!!”. But what bugs me most, is not that I want to do that, but because when I whine it at him and then try to say something along the lines of, “You should let me do that!”, it’s just a conversation silencer. He immediately goes quiet and I swear, intentionally stays that way so that I won’t say anything else about it…

Rant over!

So anyways, we ended up coming across some incredibly sexy videos dealing with lesbians and double dildos (another thing that The Boyfriend has really gotten into recently). The first night, I don’t think we watched for long at all before beginning our serious playing – where penetrative sex is being had, but we’re not actually having sex, more like just teasing each other for prolonged lengths of time. The most memorable moment of the night was getting up to get a drink and being stopped mid-way to be bent over and pounded from behind, my hands on the floor near my feet. It felt good and he enjoyed the view.

The Boyfriend had one birthday wish, one that the mere thought of the wish coming true, completely ruined the chances of it ever happening. As I’ve probably said before, The Boyfriend enjoys anal quite a bit – not really sure why he enjoys it as much as he does, and he definitely doesn’t know either, but he does. I, on the other hand, really don’t care for anal sex. I grew up wanting to be a total anal whore, but now that I’ve tried anal sex my required three times, I just can’t seem to really enjoy it. There have been a few times but for the most part, if and when I do it, I’m totally just doing it to please him.

It came as no surprise that his birthday wish would be anal and before he even said it, I knew he was going to ask if I’d be down. I had mentally prepared myself to say yes and was intentionally trying to rough up the serious playing so that I’d be more likely to enjoy the discomfort anal sex brings me. Alas, as he whispered in my ear, “Can I?”, the entire thought of it proved to be just a little too much for his (to quote Sadopaeidia – the best book ever!) “John Thomas” and he ended up cumming right there and then. I had already had a short orgasm earlier on in the playing and was quite pleased when he asked me if I thought I could cum again while he went limp inside me – so hot!

The next day (although, refer to the point about this above, because it was technically still the same day), he was doing little things all day long to keep me quite ready for more. Like when he needed to use my soft clothes to wipe one of his games off and he gently rubs his fingertips up my legs, starting from my ankles and all the way up to my inner thigh or the gentle kisses he pampered my neck with as I sat on the computer blogging away. By the time we got into bed, all I could do was think about what we were going to do to each other.

We’d both been talking about 69’ing for some time and just never actually found ourselves doing it. But it had been a really long time since we last 69’ed, so I put my foot down and demanded some oral sex! Again the lesbian double dildo-type porn was put on and it didn’t take either one of us long to decide that we were ready to really begin getting it on. It had been so long that we were both a little awkward about it, as I expected. We couldn’t get comfortable, my pussy was up too high for his tongue to reach and my boobs kept getting in the way of me being comfortable on top of him, but eventually we got it all sorted out.

I could not get over how long he seemed to be and how difficult I was finding it to get most of him in my mouth. Usually, it doesn’t seem that hard. After our orgasms had finished, which beautifully happened at the exact same moment, I mentioned how long he seemed and it turned out that someone had spent some time shaving – not a lot, just a trim (because that’s how I like it). I was most pleased and feel asleep dreaming of trimmed pubic hair.

I am sincerely hoping that tonight will result in another sex-session, but for now, we’re just enjoying the peace and quiet of everyone’s bedtime 😉

This post is intended for adults 18+


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Things I’ve Learnt About My Sexual Self


  • I get really moody after a few days of not having sex
  • I get a little paranoid the longer it is between sex sessions
    Example: I start believing The Boyfriend is cheating on me…
  • My emotional state prior to a sex session largely determines my emotional state immediately following the sex session
  • I really suck at staying mad at someone when they make sexual advances…
  • I am much more aware of my physical flaws during sex (and not just because they’re out in the open more, because I tend to keep a lot of my clothes on…)
  • I feel much younger the day after sex, even though my body aches more
  • The more I think I’m going to orgasm sooner, the longer it takes to actually reach orgasm. Whereas if I think that it’s going to take forever, it’s normally so fast that I almost regret it, because then sex is like a five minute deal…
  • And while five minutes totally rocks sometimes, it gives me no chance to loosen up to have a really great orgasm
  • I have a very hard time staying reasonably quiet during sex, and I have no idea if it’s affecting how good the sex is…
  • On average, I can last a whole two days before I start feeling like it’s been too long since I last had sex…
  • Porn and I have a very odd and complicated relationship…
There’s more, I just can’t think of any right now. Look forward to updates!!!
This post is intended for adults 18+


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There’s Nothing That Turns Me On More… Than a Man Messaging His Guild!


 

I don’t know what it is lately, but I have been getting laid a heck of a lot more recently. It seems like we’re back up to our average of about 3 times a week. Needless to say, I’m quite a happy girl.

Often times, we’ll even have sex two nights in a row, which has been rare ever since we had Carter. I’m not sure what the change is or what happened that he’s turning into a little horn dog, and I’m trying my best not to think too hard about it, because then I’ll start hypothesizing and that just always turns out bad, because my mind goes to the worst. I’m just sitting back and enjoying the ride!

Last night was definitely one of my most favorite nights. We both went on our computers and I checked FetLife as part of my usual checking-stuff-on-the-internet-when-it-first-opens (Facebook, Twitter, FetLife, Email…). Well FetLife just happened to be running a live stream of the MorpheusBondageExtravaganza. So I hunkered down and decided to enjoy, and boy did I ever! Seriously, some of the hottest stuff I’ve ever seen on the internet!!

The 2 hours or so that I watched was all really intense rope bondage and rigging scenes. When we shut it off (which is a bit of shame, but totally worth it…), they were getting into some needle play stuff. My favorite part was the music a long with the scenes, because it blended really well and I heard some tunes that I definitely want to check out now. Next to that, it was watching the sensuality of the play and artistic-ness of it all. It just looked so beautiful.

So when The Boyfriend got off his computer to give me a neck massage (which I was begging for after a few hours of cleaning last night), he asked if we could watch one of the porns that I’ve had for years, but have never really watched. I didn’t like it because there is a part where this girl asks this guy to oink for her, but it’s in such a badly done way that you just can’t find it very sexy. Last night, it hardly got watched at all.

We were both ready and raring to go by the time the movie started, add in the moaning of other people on top of my moaning, and it’s a surprise that the sex lasted almost 2 hours!! But that’s because my beautiful boyfriend has gotten into foreplay 😉

Again, I have no idea what has caused this at all, but it used to be where sex was 15 minutes to half an hour tops. It would be me spending a few minutes getting him nice and hard by caressing him and rubbing his cock and then it would be straight down to business, with the main mission being orgasm. Now, it’s a total 180. We spend the first half an hour on nothing but foreplay and I’m usually the one reaping the rewards there, and he barely gets touched. And then it’s very long, drawn out sex after that.

He’s really gotten into the idea of having smokes in compromising positions lately and we both have a lot of fun with the tease of it all. I don’t know how many times we’ll be in the full swing of sex and then he’ll pull back and say, “Smoke time” and will reach over while still inside of me to grab the smokes. Through the whole smoke we’ll gently and playfully rock against each other, most of the time, him gently caressing his favorite parts of my body, like my legs, boobs or neck.

The worship of my body in general lately has been beyond sublime. He kisses everywhere and grabs firmly at my breasts. He slides his hand up my chest and wraps his fingers around my neck. He grabs my hair and kisses my neck, my cheek, my lips as his other hand gently moves down my thigh.

The talking is the other thing that I’m loving! He talks so much now. Last night, he tells me before we even start, “I want you to cum multiple times tonight!”, and while that may not sound that hot when it’s written down, when you’re in the moment, the hottest thing ever. It didn’t take me long to cum the first time. But even during sex, it’s a constant stream of sexy talking. He seems to like to instruct me on how he would like me to talk to him, the things that he would like to hear. One of my favorites is when he tells me to beg for his cock and when I get to say to him that he can do anything he wants to me.

I’ve been getting quite a bit of oral sex lately and last night was no exception. The first time he went down there, it took almost no time at all for me to cum. And he lapped it all up and I was in total ecstacy. But it gets better when he fucks me right after I’ve cum. My entire body feels really intense and tingly all over. He sat back and while he pumped in and out of me, he played rather frantically with my clit. I was so sure I was going to cum, but I think it was all just a little too intense for me. Smoke break!

Then, he decided to help the second cumming along with more oral sex. I’ve never had oral sex after already cumming once. Super intense! He kept sucking on my clit and seriously something about that just feels really good, especially if little moans escape his lips. He jutted his chin out and let me grind his face, which was another incredible feeling. It took quite awhile, but I erupted into another extremely intense orgasm that seemed to last forever.

Again there was more fucking and then he asked if I would rather him cum all over my chest or in my mouth. I chose mouth. It wasn’t much longer until he was unloading in my mouth, so much that I couldn’t even conceive the idea of swallowing. For the first time ever, I let all his hot cum drip back out onto his cock and it was surprisingly hot, though I couldn’t help but feel like it was a waste…

Amazing sex with an amazing man! Now, if only I could get him to spank me!!